By the roaring waves!

where songs die

When I miss you I simply return to the pond in the garden and stand there for hours. I see our reflection there, in the clear water, you standing right beside me your shoulder touching my shoulder, our entire wujood smiling. Melting in pure happiness. A sense of shukr, a belief of togetherness, an unbeatable satisfaction. No fear, no tear, and look at me now.

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2019, Passages

dream, soul, what

I saw you in a dream. Again. How many times I think about taking your name but dust it off, it’s not possible. It’s not good. It’s not useful either.

I saw you in a dream again and it was so real. Like our two separate lives. Manind e Khushfehmi. I ask him “haal e shuma chitoray” and he takes his time. I imagine him opening a new tab. He searches for it and replies: “theek Alhamdulillah.”

I am already 4 languages down but it doesn’t create a mess in me anymore. The loudest is the language of art only. And some day I will tell you it was the soul’s.

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2019, Urdu musings

Maseeha Mazaq

Maseeha!
Tum ho ke mai?

Ye batain saari jhoot hain ya sachh? Kia pata sachh keh kar dhoka hojaye. Kia pata jhoot hi sara sachha ho?

Tum samajhtay rahay tum maseeha ho

Kia pata kuch anokha ye qissa ho

Kia pata tum jis talaash per niklay, mai uskey dusray siray pe kharay jab tumhara intizar kartay thak jaun tou tum se kaheen agaay nikal jaun.

Tum samajhtay rahogay mai palat aungi kyunke tumhe lagta hai tum maseeha ho

Mera Maseeha mujhay tor kar jor deta hai. Lekin tumhe kia dikhata hai? Jhoot? Ya sachh?

Kia pata Uski Maseehai tumhe bhi lag jaye. Kia pata tumhe maafi mil jaye

Kia pata kabhi tum mujhay maseeha samjho.

Kia pata tum is uljhan se kabhi na niklo

Aameen.

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