2014, My Writings

My dark man.

“It is not I who accepted the Dark Life. The Dark Life accepted me.”

He sat on a rock, his head bowed and hands resting on knees. “I did not want to be what I have become. But I like it now… It suits me. I feel I am where I belong. It is Real. It is Me.”

I was sitting before him on the road and there was no one else around. When he said these words, I looked at him. I wanted more answers, and I was searching for them in his eyes. They are windows to your soul, after all, but somehow his soul was a locked corridor now– the key to which was unknown to even himself, I suppose.

“Are you satisfied without having any friends?” I asked.

“You are my friend!” he replied with a smile. I will never forget that smile.

“I know that,” I said his name, “but I am not always there around you, right? I never know where you are, what you are doing, how you’ve been. I worry about you. Who takes care of you when you’re not here? No one. And if that wasn’t bad enough, you don’t give an inch importance to yourself either. Why?

“I don’t need to. I am happy and more contented with my life than you can imagine. I don’t need these things. Care, look-after, love; these aid other people… People who can’t live without people, who depend on other humans and emotions as a weakling depends on crutches. I have come far from that now. It makes no sense to me.”

How would he know what “weaklings” were truly like, I thought. People need people, they need these “crutches” to walk around this world. Why doesn’t he get it? Or more importantly, how did he overcome this necessity?

He was at ease with his lifestyle, and he meant his words more than any of us could. He could see beyond his time, and yet no future thought worried him. He could look in a glance at his past and go through his early details in a minute– yet he was one whom you’d never find regretting or complaining about his choices (or their causes), or taking pleasure in revisiting his memory lanes for that matter.

He was not normal. Yet he looked more saner than many, some times. That was perhaps because he had given himself to his goal: it could either be absolute good or absolute evil that would complete your life and give meaning to your otherwise worthless existence. He had found ‘It’ in evil.

“Would you come back to meet me again?” one asked.

“Yes. But it will take longer this time.” other replied.

We both smiled as he got up and held out his hand to me, which I gave without a moment’s pause. Standing face-to-face I tried yet again to search him in his eyes, as if their color would light my way too and I’d be able to find a clue. He stepped closer and put his hand softly on mine, slowly whispering a “no”. Maybe he thought I could really do that if I tried?

He turned around then, and started to move away. There was the famous S-shaped scar at the back of his neck which always looked fresh and red, and was so deeply cut a wound that it pained me to only look at it. I followed him with my gaze, thinking of what he was and what he could never be, until tears blocked my vision and I smiled to let go.

[Okay, hellooo. I was having a real hard time connecting words but I also badly wanted to write a story-sort so here goes. Let me know what you think of it!]


22 thoughts on “My dark man.

  1. *whistles* This is what I did at the end.
    This is so cool, Maria (like yay for my vocabulary , I am spellbound-.-)!
    It made my heart skip a beat with sadness yet made me smile at this man. It takes hell loads of courage to live a crutch-free life.
    Keep Writing!

  2. Don’t tell me that dark man was your ego ? Or if not, then that ‘dark’ person doesn’t seem dark to me at all. He has overcome the biggest fears and needs of human beings…. He can be called as the ‘ideal’ human, not the dark one. The way of expression was perfect, the meanings inside are blurr. I guess that’s what make your writings wonderful.

    • Hi … Since I am already here … I thought I should at least spend some time…!!! šŸ™‚

      Plus I get to talk to both of you … Which means kay EID aa gyi hai meri … kyun Maria … !!! šŸ˜€

      Firstly … Both of you just reminded me why I miss you guys so much … I also just finished reading … A Walk to Remember … by Lala Rukh … Not that stupid one by Nicolas Sparks …. !!! LOL :p

      Well jaha tak pure evil ya pure good hone ka sawaal hai … I believe dono he mumkin nai hain … else insaan phir insaan nai rehe ga … pure evil to Shaitaan he hai … And I believe kay Allah Pak ne humain es liye nai banaya kay hum pure good ho gye … woh to pehle se he itne Malaaika mojood hain … hamara to maqsad he justajoo hai … aik na khatam hoone wali justajoo … ye burai aur achai ki larai insaan kay ander paida hone se aakhri saans tak chalti hai … Insaan galti karta hai phir Allah Pak ki traf palata hai … phir karta hai aur phir palata hai … aur yehi us kay wajood ki khoobsorti hai …!!!

      Just a thought ….!!! Stay Blessed šŸ˜€

  3. Pingback: My dark man. (2) | Ria

  4. Pingback: My dark man. (3) | Ria

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