The solid mass that a jungle of scribbled lines create. That shapeless bunch of black with white gaps, that disorderly pen creation. That is what anxiety forms in heart. Just puts it there on the floor—the weighty bundle of chaos. I was wondering if I could put this emotion into words while I felt it. And if it would, in any way, lessen it. Guess it didn’t~
Tag Archives: self
01:01
A shadow of a portion of trees falling on the road, moving continuously with the wind. And I see two yellow bulbs hanging from the lower branches. For no reason, it makes me think of you.
It rained recently. It was so beautiful, started something around five in the evening. The best, best part was the beginning. You stand there and look from your gallery, and it’s this powerful shower and this serene noise, and this washed green, and happy faces; busy, happy city. It’s the kind of chaos you want to melt into.
I have mixed night and day here in the writing. But it’s kind of like that these days. So mixed. I try and fail, cannot hold any end of this string. It’s not bad but it’s not good either. More like the “middle” of a process. Boring, slow, confusing, but not extremely pathetic. Because you know what comes from a thing like that and well, you’re looking forward to it…
وکالت
‘میں جانے کے لئے تیار ہوں۔’
‘تم نے خود کو ہلکا کرلیا ہے ناں؟’
‘ہاں! اور میں نے خود بھی سب کو معاف کردیا یے۔۔۔ سب، سوائے ایک ’
‘ایسا مت کہو!۔۔۔ اسے عذاب ہوگا’
‘پہلی بات تو یہ کہ وہ عذاب سے نہیں ڈرتا! اور اسے صرف بدلہ ملے گا، عذاب نہیں’
‘تم پھر سوچ لو’
‘میں اللہ جی سے بات کر چکی ہوں۔ صرف اسے ہی نہیں کرسکتی۔ ایک بوجھ اٹھا لونگی’
‘لیکن’
‘آپ کو اللہ جی نے اسکی وکالت کے لئے بھیجا ہے ناں؟ مجھے سمجھ نہیں آتا وہ اس سے اتنی محبت کیسے کرسکتے ہیں جب وہ ہی نہیں کرتا؟’
‘وہ تم سے محبت کرتے ہیں!۔’
‘انہیں میں منا لونگی۔ یا پھر آپ انہیں کہیں وہ ہی مجھے منا لیں’
Truly Yours.
To you, I want to give flowers–I don’t mind that being cliched–
Roses, wrapped in ribbons. Letters, soaked in perfume. Stars.
Unnecessary though it might be, I want to tell you again and so often
Love, how much I have come to love you that I’ve now begun to live you.
Your thought is my drug, your memory is heaven’s mercy,
Your presence is an air without which my lungs parch up.
Oh the Sun of my universe, the Light of my soul!
Undying is my adoration–like a forever flowing ocean.
Remember this: my gift to you is my heart. I am yours.
Some day you’ll see. That some day, we will be.
Written in response to Writing 201 challenge: write something about a gift, use a simile. Poem form: acrostic. (The first letters of each line together form a special word which is the theme here.) Hi.